Have you ever woken from a dream feeling strangely affected, as if you'd just had a profound conversation with a part of yourself you never knew existed?  Or, have you had dreams that were weird and confusing, or maybe just plain frightening?  For men, particularly, dreams can be a battleground where our deepest desires clash with hidden fears and anxieties.

Carl Jung, the renowned psychologist, believed these dreams held the key to unlocking our true potential, and that's where Active Imagination comes in. Active Imagination is a self-discovery tool developed by Jung that goes beyond simply analyzing dreams. It's a guided exploration of your inner world, where you engage with the characters, emotions, and symbols that emerge from your unconscious.

What is Active Imagination?

Between 1913 and 1916, Carl Jung introduced the concept of active imagination, a meditation method where the unconscious mind's contents are translated into visualizations, stories, or personified entities. It acts as a link between the conscious ego and the unconscious, often involving exploration of dreams and creativity through imagination or fantasy. Jung associated active imagination with alchemical processes, both aiming for unity and interconnectedness from fragmented parts. He documented this process in his Red Book.  Reading Jung's Red Book is not for the faint of heart though.  I have found Robert Johnson's interpretation of Jung's work in Inner Work: Using Dreams and Active Imagination for Personal Growth to be very consumable and practical.

The essence of active imagination lies in allowing internal images to unfold without interference from the conscious mind. For instance, if someone were describing a dream scene, Jung's method advises observing changes in the scene rather than imposing desired alterations consciously. This approach encourages genuine responses to these changes, ensuring that unconscious contents manifest without undue influence from the conscious mind. However, Jung emphasized the necessity of active participation in the process, urging individuals to engage with their personal reactions as if the unfolding drama were real.

Active imagination, as described by Carl Jung and further developed by Robert Johnson, is a method used in Jungian psychology for accessing the unconscious through creative means. Here are the basic steps:

1. Preparation: Find a quiet and comfortable space where you won't be disturbed. Set aside some time for the active imagination session.
2. Relaxation: Begin by relaxing your body and mind. You can do this through deep breathing, progressive muscle relaxation, or any other relaxation technique that works for you.
3. Focus: Choose an image, symbol, dream, or emotion that you want to explore. This can be something that's been on your mind lately or a recurring theme in your dreams.
4. Engagement: Engage with the chosen image or symbol by allowing it to unfold in your mind's eye. Let your imagination take over and observe where the image leads you.
5. Dialogue: As the imagery unfolds, engage in a dialogue with the characters, symbols, or emotions that arise. Ask them questions and listen for their responses. This dialogue can provide insights into your unconscious mind.
6. Reflection: After the active imagination session, take some time to reflect on your experience. Write down any insights, feelings, or revelations that came up during the process.
7. Integration: Finally, integrate the insights gained from the active imagination session into your daily life. Consider how you can apply these insights to your relationships, work, or personal development.

This work can feel very unnatural and foreign, but in many ways it feels like a path back to the creativity and imagination most of us enjoyed when we were younger and before the assumed cares of our modern lives quietly shut them down.  If you're anything like me, there's probably a sense that maybe life doesn't have to be as hard as we've made it, or perhaps there's something else that I'm supposed to be doing.  Anything that can help with that discovery is worth trying!

While active imagination can be a valuable tool for self-discovery and psychological growth, it may not be suitable for everyone in every circumstance.

Here are some considerations:

1. Mental Health: Individuals with certain mental health conditions, such as severe psychosis or schizophrenia, may not be suitable candidates for active imagination without professional guidance. Engaging with the unconscious in such cases could potentially exacerbate symptoms or lead to distressing experiences.
2. Stability: It's essential to have a relatively stable mental and emotional state before delving into active imagination. If someone is currently experiencing acute distress or instability, it might be wise to postpone or approach the practice with caution.
3. Support: Having support from a qualified mental health professional, such as a therapist or counselor, can be beneficial when exploring active imagination. They can provide guidance, help interpret experiences, and offer support if challenging material arises.
4. Personal Readiness: Each individual is different, and what feels appropriate for one person may not for another. It's essential to assess one's readiness and comfort level with exploring the unconscious before engaging in active imagination.
5. Respect for Boundaries: Practitioners of active imagination should be mindful of their boundaries and limitations. It's okay to pause or disengage from the process if it becomes overwhelming or uncomfortable.

"The key to happiness is finding your gift. The purpose of life is giving it away." - Pablo Picasso

Imagine standing at a crossroads, dust swirling around your boots as the wind whispers ancient secrets. One path leads to gilded towers, promise of wealth and status glinting like fool's gold. Another, faint and infrequently travelled, beckoning with the quiet whisper of purpose and possibility. This, my fellow traveler, is the crossroads of midlife, and your compass isn't a GPS, but your forgotten and trampled Ikigai – your reason for being.

The Japanese concept of Ikigai isn't about finding a "dream job"; it's about weaving purpose into the tapestry of your existence. It's the sweet spot where your passion intersects with your skills, what the world needs, and what you can be paid for. But for many men in their 30s and 40s, this sweet spot feels more like a mirage in the desert. Work feels robotic, passions dusty relics, and purpose? That's a word reserved for motivational posters.

Ikigai (pronounced ee-kee-guy) is your reason for being, your life purpose, or what makes your life worth living. It's that feeling of passion and fulfillment that gets you out of bed every morning, even on tough days. It's more than just a hobby or a career; it's the intersection of:

• What you love (Passion): Activities you enjoy and find intrinsically rewarding.
• What you're good at (Mission): Skills and talents you possess and can use to make a difference.
• What the world needs (Vocation): How your skills and passions can contribute to society in a meaningful way.
• What you can be paid for (Profession): How you can earn a living while doing what you love, are good at, and contributes to the world.

Your Ikigai is found at the convergence of:

Finding your ikigai, your "reason for being," can be a challenge for anyone, but certainly feels magnified in an age where traditional notions of male value are shifting.  How do I know?  Because I am man, living in the modern world!  However, even if external markers of worth seem dimmed, the potential for a fulfilling life and meaningful contribution remains constant. Here are some ideas to help men navigate this path:

Reconnecting with Core Values:

• Challenge the Narratives: Don't subscribe to narratives that define a man's worth solely by career success, physical prowess, or societal expectations. Instead, explore your own values: what matters most to you? What qualities do you want to embody?
• Focus on Strengths & Passions: Rediscover your natural talents and passions. What activities light you up from within? What skills come naturally to you? Reconnecting with these can lead to unexpected paths of ikigai.
• Redefining Contribution: Broaden your definition of contribution beyond traditional metrics. It can be mentoring a young person, volunteering in your community, nurturing family relationships, or creating art that touches others.

Exploring New Avenues:

• Lifelong Learning: Embrace learning as a journey, not an endpoint. Explore new skills, pick up hobbies, and delve into subjects that pique your curiosity. This not only keeps your mind active but can open doors to unexpected ikigai.
• Creative Pursuits: Don't be afraid to tap into your creative side. Whether it's writing, painting, music, or tinkering with inventions, expressing yourself creatively can be deeply fulfilling and connect you to your ikigai.
• Community & Relationships: Building strong connections with others is a key aspect of human well-being. Find communities that share your values and interests, engage in meaningful conversations, and offer support to others.

Shifting Mindsets:

• Embrace Growth & Change: View this as a time of reinvention, not decline. Accept that ikigai may evolve over time, and be open to new possibilities.
• Challenge Negative Beliefs: Don't let ageist notions or internalized expectations hold you back. Believe in your own potential and ability to find purpose and meaning.
• Practice Gratitude: Focus on the positive aspects of your life, the blessings you have, and the experiences that shape you. Gratitude can shift your perspective and open doors to joy and meaning

Remember, you're not alone on this journey. Places like ours are dedicated to guiding men like you through the midlife maze. With retreats, coaching, and a supportive community, we can help you rediscover your passion, hone your skills, and find your unique place in the world.

So, my friend, dust off your boots, dig out your compass, and answer the call of the unknown. Your Ikigai awaits, shimmering in the distance. Are you ready to find it?

Additional Resources:

Books:

• Ikigai: The Japanese Secret to a Long and Happy Life by Hector Garcia and Francesc Miralles: This international bestseller delves into the Ikigai concept, offering practical exercises and insights from the centenarians of Okinawa, Japan.
• Man's Search for Meaning by Viktor Frankl: A powerful memoir by a Holocaust survivor who emphasizes finding purpose even in the most challenging circumstances.  A must-read in my opinion.
• What Color Is Your Parachute?: Your Guide to a Lifetime of Meaningful Work and Career Success by Richard Bolles: More than a job-hunting book, Richard N. Bolles’s timeless wisdom and famed self-assessment exercise clarifies seven key dimensions, so you can uncover your greatest passions, most valued traits, and transferable skills to design a life that enables you to flourish.
• The Pathfinder: How to Choose or Change Your Career for a Lifetime of Satisfaction by Nicholas Lore: This book provides a structured framework for career exploration and decision-making, helping men find fulfilling work that aligns with their Ikigai.

Websites & Online Resources:

• The Ikigai Project: This website offers online tools and resources, including an Ikigai Venn Diagram and journaling prompts, to help individuals explore their Ikigai.
• The School of Life: This website and YouTube channel offer insightful videos and articles on various life topics, including finding purpose and meaning.

In the intricate web of the human brain, there lies a fascinating phenomenon that has captured the attention of neuroscientists and psychologists alike – neuroplasticity. This inherent ability of the brain to reorganize itself and form new neural connections throughout life offers a beacon of hope for those seeking personal growth and a more fulfilled existence. Coupled with the concept of PQ (Positive Intelligence), neuroplasticity becomes a powerful tool in our quest for a happier, more meaningful life.

Understanding Neuroplasticity:

Neuroplasticity, often referred to as the brain's adaptability, is the ability of neural networks in the brain to change through growth and reorganization. This means that the brain can form new connections and pathways in response to learning, experience, and even injury. Far from being a static organ, the brain is a dynamic, ever-changing entity that can adapt and evolve. I don't know about you, but this is exciting and encouraging!

The Role of PQ:

Positive Intelligence, or PQ, is a concept introduced by Stanford lecturer and positive psychologist Shirzad Chamine. It focuses on strengthening the positive pathways in the brain to enhance one's mental fitness and overall well-being. The foundation of PQ lies in understanding and managing the "Saboteurs" – the internal voices that undermine our happiness and success.

Combining Neuroplasticity and PQ:

The synergy between neuroplasticity and PQ becomes apparent when we consider the power of positive thinking and intentional rewiring of the brain. By consciously engaging in activities that promote positive neural connections, we can reshape our thought patterns and responses to external stimuli. This intentional effort to foster positivity aligns seamlessly with the principles of PQ.

Practical Strategies:

1. Mindfulness Meditation: Engaging in mindfulness practices has been shown to induce structural changes in the brain associated with increased self-awareness and emotional regulation. These changes contribute to a more positive outlook on life.
2. Gratitude Journaling: Cultivating a habit of acknowledging and appreciating the positive aspects of life can create new neural pathways associated with gratitude, leading to a more optimistic mindset.
3. Acts of Kindness: Performing acts of kindness not only benefits others but also triggers the brain's reward system, releasing feel-good neurotransmitters. Over time, this can reshape the brain to be more attuned to positive experiences.
4. Positive Affirmations: Repeating positive affirmations can counteract the negative influence of internal saboteurs, fostering a mindset of self-compassion and confidence.
5. Lifelong Learning: Challenging the brain with new experiences and acquiring new skills promotes neuroplasticity. This continual learning process can enhance cognitive function and contribute to a sense of accomplishment.

Conclusion:

In the pursuit of a more fulfilled life, the collaboration between neuroplasticity and PQ offers a transformative approach. By consciously rewiring our brains through positive practices and intentional efforts, we can break free from limiting thought patterns and cultivate a more optimistic and resilient mindset. As we navigate the intricate landscape of our brains, let us embrace the power of neuroplasticity and PQ to unlock the door to a more vibrant and fulfilling existence!

We all have inner voices that criticize, judge, doubt, or worry about ourselves and others. These are our saboteurs, and they can prevent us from achieving our goals, enjoying our relationships, and living a happy and meaningful life.

Saboteurs are not our true selves. They are learned patterns of thinking that we developed in childhood to cope with stress, fear, or pain. They may have served us well at some point, but they are no longer helpful or adaptive. In fact, they can sabotage our success, health, and happiness.

The good news is that we can overcome our saboteurs and increase our positive intelligence. Positive intelligence is the ability to use our mind in a positive and constructive way, rather than a negative and destructive way. It is measured by the percentage of time that we operate from our sage, which is our wise and calm inner voice that can handle any challenge with clarity, compassion, and creativity.

The higher our positive intelligence, the more we can achieve our potential, overcome obstacles, and experience joy and fulfillment. Research shows that positive intelligence is the best predictor of performance and happiness across any domain of life.

So how can we increase our positive intelligence and enhance our mental fitness? Here are some practical tips that you can apply in your everyday life:

• Identify your saboteurs. The first step is to become aware of the different types of saboteurs that you have and how they show up in your thoughts, feelings, and behaviors. There are 10 common saboteurs: Judge, Controller, Avoider, Victim, Stickler, Pleaser, Restless, Hyper-Achiever, Hyper-Rational, and Hyper-Vigilant. You can take a free assessment at www.positiveintelligence.com to discover your top saboteurs.
• Challenge your saboteurs. The second step is to challenge the validity and usefulness of your saboteur thoughts. You can do this by asking yourself questions such as: Is this thought true? Is this thought helpful? What evidence do I have for this thought? What evidence do I have against this thought? What would my sage say about this situation? By questioning your saboteur thoughts, you can weaken their hold on you and open up space for your sage to emerge.
• Activate your sage. The third step is to activate your sage powers. Your sage has five powers: Empathize, Explore, Innovate, Navigate, and Activate. Each power helps you deal with a different aspect of a challenge: understanding yourself and others, finding the root cause of the problem, generating creative solutions, choosing the best course of action, and taking effective steps to implement it. You can activate your sage powers by asking yourself questions such as: What am I feeling right now? What are others feeling? What is the real issue here? What are some possible options? What is the best option for me? What are the next steps I need to take?
• Practice mental exercises. The fourth step is to practice mental exercises that strengthen your positive neural pathways and weaken your negative ones. These are simple activities that you can do throughout the day to boost your positive intelligence and mental fitness. For example, you can focus on your breath for 10 seconds, notice three things that you are grateful for, or smile at someone you meet. These exercises help you shift from your saboteur mode to your sage mode and increase your happiness and resilience.

By following these tips, you can overcome your saboteurs and live a more fulfilled life. Remember that positive intelligence is a skill that you can learn and improve with practice. The more you practice, the more you will benefit from the wisdom and power of your sage.

I have become a huge fan of these exercises. It doesn't take much to begin experiencing true transformation in your mind, which leads to transformation in your life! Don't wait. Start practicing today!

If you're curious to know more, don't hesitate to contact us. Personal transformation is our mission, and we're itching to help you get started on your own.

The one little word that can change your life.

We’ve all met the magnanimous person who can, seemingly with no effort, wrap up a strong difference of opinion with warm understanding and complete acceptance. Personally, I’ve looked at these people, either thinking, “They’re phony!” or “They’re a coward!”. I’ve been convinced they were just “trying to be nice” despite what they were thinking or feeling inside or were simply conflict avoidant. As I came to find out, my opinion and musings reflected my internal state of being, not theirs.

A growth-oriented and emotionally intelligent individual has the ability (or  learned skillset) to allow for multiple things to be true at the same time and has respect for whatever the path was that led the other party to their conclusion. “Everyone’s beliefs, opinions, and biases are legitimate”. This generous spirit of magnanimity knows that, by supporting anyone with an opposing viewpoint, they uphold the more fundamental idea of personal agency, a critical component of a healthy individual and community. Furthermore, taking this stance brings an immediate sense of peace and well-being.

The expansive capacity of “and” is a result of deep, inner work. That works begins with small steps that add up to revolutionizing a life filled with friction, first with yourself and then with others.

 “And” is the word at the balancing point on the wide spectrum of beliefs, biases, and conditioned opinions. It is the magnet that brings opposites together and mitigates any possibility of separation. It is unifying. This principle applies to how you feel about yourself as well as others.

Let’s explore how this might play out in day-to-day scenarios. We’ll start by highlighting a very simple shift in perception. I love cats but he loves dogs! Now, let’s apply our simple shift to the same sentence. I love cats and he loves dogs!

You can immediately feel how the first sentence highlighted the difference through separation and judgement and how the second highlighted the difference with inclusion and acceptance. “But” carries with it an air of the other being illegitimate or opposing. “And” brings both parties cleanly  and wholly into the same peaceful, expansive place where all things are considered as equally legitimate. The difference hasn’t changed but YOU have!

In this next example, let’s explore how this might apply to our judgements about ourselves and result in personal, internal friction or pain. “I want to be the kind of person who is organized but I’m a procrastinator.” Immediately, you’ve shut down your creative pull and identified more with your block. If you say, “I want to be the kind of person who is organized and I’m a procrastinator”, you’ve created a subtle acknowledgement of your block without shutting down your creative pull. You’ve pulled your block out into the light without judgement, which puts you in direct control of your desired outcome.

We’ll dig into this concept more deeply in upcoming articles but I would love to see you put this simple principle to work in your life in the smallest of ways and watch the positive changes begin to take place.

Write us! We’d love to hear how this is working for you. If you have any questions along the way, please reach out!